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My Pledge To You

My pledge to you

My pledge to your well-being

“What I offer is an empathic and deeply present professional to talk with. I listen, understand and I will meet and challenge you, all to improve your quality of life, well being and to regain your sense of purpose.

My online platform helps you to take that important first step to 24/7 support; available to you at your convenience, with affordable and flexible options, providing you with therapy in your pocket and getting support when you need it most.

 Remember, there is no “right time” or “right reason” to seek therapeutic and professional support. You will most likely gain something out of every consultation, regardless of what it is about. 

Learn more about me, and see exactly what I mean with “if I am awake and available, I am yours”.

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

Or contact me here

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Acute Couples Counselling Couples Counselling

Can my relationship recover from an affair?

With an estimated 23% of partners admitting to cheating, is it time for us to positively address infidelity in relationships? 

There is no doubt about it – relationships can be tough.

The thrill and excitement you felt in the early stages of dating might have diminished with time, while life pressures and over-familiarity with your spouse can create tensions or resentments.

Does this sound familiar? 

You or your partner might react to home and relationship stressors by having an affair. And this isn’t as uncommon as you might think. A survey conducted between 2017 and 2018 spanning almost 50,000 Danes, an average of 9,000 respondents admitting to cheating. 

For some, the discovery of infidelity is enough to end the relationship. But for many others, a way forward is possible. 

I offer hope to you and your partner if you wish to repair the rupture in your relationship after the discovery of infidelity.

What is ‘infidelity’?

Definitions matter when describing infidelity. A 2-year affair does not manifest, nor have the same impact, as a one-night-stand does. Did you know that an emotional affair can damage more than a  physical one? 

Universally, an infidelity (in any form) is a fundamental betrayal of the other partner in the relationship.

When discovered, it causes immense pain, guilt, anger, shame, distrust and confusion.  Research has also shown a causative link between infidelity and poor mental health, domestic violence and divorce. 

If you have discovered infidelity in your relationship or you yourself are being unfaithful, you might ask yourself;

  • Why would my partner do this to me?
  • Why have I done this to my partner?
  • How am I ever going to trust him/her again?
  • What is wrong with me that they would feel they need to do this?
  • What does that third person have that I don’t?
  • How do we repair this? 
  • What about our children / apartment / future together? 
  • Can therapy help with this problem?

What’s important to understand is that you do not have to suffer alone. There is a safe and constructive way to explore these questions and find a way forward – couples therapy

Your relationship needs an impartial professional who can help you unpack the relevant aspects of the relationship and identify a) what brought you to this point, b) where you’d like to go from here and c) how you’re going to get there. 

I will help guide the conversation through exploring the rupture, sharing the pain and finally mapping out how to take positive action and bring responsibility and shared care to the relationship, and to the individuals involved. Finally, we may look at the role the “other” person has had in the rupture, and how to bring meaning back into the relationship, this time without betrayal and shame. 

Why do we cheat?

When you discover an affair, your first question is often – why? 

I can see why you might want an instant answer to that question – but infidelity is complicated. There is no ‘one-size-fits-all’ reason why it occurs. The reasons for unfaithfulness are multifaceted and unique to your relationship. That’s the whole point of couples therapy – together, we look at your particular circumstances and identify what happened within your relationship. 

Research conducted by Barta, W. D., & Kiene, S. M. (2005) identified the following possible motivations for unfaithfulness, some of which you may be able to identify with:

  • A need for variety:  74% of research respondents identified a desire for variety after feeling that the relationship has stagnated. 
  • Neglect: 70%of respondents said that feeling neglected was a partial driver in causing the infidelity. 
  • Low self esteem: 57% of respondents said that cheating on their partner helped boost their self esteem. 
  • Lack of commitment: 41% said low levels of commitment towards their partner caused them to cheat. 
  • Lack of sex: 32% said that lack of sex, sexual issues or sexual disalignment caused them to look elsewhere for sexual fulfilment. 

Furthermore, it’s important to know that certain contributing factors will increase the likelihood of infidelity, such as having an insecure attachment style, having a material or immaterial addiction, perhaps displacing a challenge from work. The hardest reason to spot can be the accumulation of the “blah-di-blahs”; a slow and steady pile-up of small occurrences that cause the intimacy in the relationship, initially strong, to slow down, fragment and break. Think of a river that flows freely and strongly to the ocean, full of well oxygenated water, plants and a varied animal life. Slow, the source of the river silts up, and the flow slows. Further downriver, new bends and curvatures add to the silting process, bringing the once roaring mouth of the river to a mere trickle. The river is slowly suffocated by other intruding natural forces. 

So, where is the water that once flowed freely in the relationship? 

Water always finds the path of least resistance, and “comes out” or “shows up” in the strangest of places.

A spark, such as a caring gesture from a colleague, or a flirt with an old friend at that get-together party can suddenly bring an eruption of water springing forward – the affair is ignited, and with it can come fiery feelings of passion, release, recognition and support in the infidelic partner, plus the thrill / guilt pattern of breaking a taboo. 

In my experience, there are four major influences that can bring a relationship to its knees. These are money, sex, power and culture. Read more about the big 4.

Since 2004 couples have found healing to their relationships and rediscovered their intimate partners by overcoming infidelity with my help. Oftentime, infidelity is a symptom of far deeper relationship issues and this does not need to define your relationship. By bringing these issues to consciousness in a safe and positive way I can help your relationship develop great depths of intimacy. 

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

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Psychotherapy

Will therapy help with my problem? And how do I know what to talk about?

Being faced with a challenge for growth, or for change, can be quite demanding – who do you turn to for help?

Everybody faces challenges at some point in their lives. A job change, a new relationship, a bereavement, a breakdown of trust  – anything that disrupts the status quo can lead to or create feelings of restlessness or misalignment. 

Oftentimes, we get through these experiences on our own, using our inner tools and resources. But sometimes, a situation or feeling can be draining, overwhelming and seemingly impossible to resolve on your own. 

For most of us these inner tools and developed resources  were constructed when we first needed them in life, unusual as children or adolescents. This means that we are using and re-using tools that are outdated and underdeveloped. 

Here can also be situations that are challenging, exciting and perhaps daunting. 

If you have found yourself in any of these life stages, the so-called “therapeutic relationship” can help you to develop these necessary tools for life. I am a fully trained and qualified psychotherapist and couples counselor offering tailor made to help you refine your inner tools and sharpen them. I also have substantial experience in business coaching and sexology.  

It’s important to understand the process we will embark upon together with the therapeutic relationship, no matter which professional tool I offer you.

What is the therapeutic relationship all about, anyway?

The therapeutic relationship can help assist you with any mental, emotional, financial, spiritual, relational, cognitive and business oriented problems and challenges. My therapeutic relationship will be beneficial to you, as I approach you in an unbiased way.

My promise of confidentiality is simple, “I offer you complete confidentiality, unless there is a risk of harm to self, other adults or minors.” 

When choosing to start the therapeutic relationship, most of my clients have begun with a free 15 minute conversation with me first. Read more about this offer here. 

So, any kind of conversation or consultation takes place in a neutral, safe environment, either online, at your place or mine. 

You begin by sharing the problem or concern that motivated you to seek out support. I will use a range of professional and therapeutic techniques to help you process the situation. The goals are many, but the idea is for you to establish a healthy and meaningful way forward.

Does all this really work? Yes, for many people it does work. Research shows that the therapeutic relationship can be just as effective as medication in the treatment of certain conditions. The advantage that talking together has over medication is that there are no side effects, no prescription costs and there is no chemical withdrawal. 

Therefore, it’s a great idea to try talking as a first step. If you still feel your needs are better met with medication, you can speak to your doctor. I am happy to assist with that process to ensure that you receive the best possible care. In fact, I receive many clients who have a referral from their doctor, and come looking for therapeutic support.


Read some of the feedback that others have left for me.

What do I talk about?

Take a moment to check out your body, feelings, thoughts and sensations. Do you have a sense of purpose and direction? What is your spirituality and sexuality all about today? All of these parts of you make up your “field of consciousness” or “personality”, as referred to within psychosynthesis psychology as 

“The personality is the collective expression of the physical body, emotions and mind and everything they contain. The personality only comes into being when we discover we have a will, and [are] able to focus it on deliberately selected outcomes. Psychosynthesis refers to this integration of the personality.”

Taking an inventory, as mentioned above, could bring your awareness to an imbalance somewhere, one that leads your attention to a problem in your surrounding life, or perhaps even vice versa.

Many, in fact one in five, experience depression at some point in their lives. Depression can be characterised as persistent low mood, loss of interest in normal activities, hopelessness, insomnia, appetite changes or lethargy – as well as other symptoms which you can read about here. But while we might have identified the prevalence of depression – how many people find the root cause of this in their personality of body, feelings and mind?


This is when you should reach out for the help you deserve. Therapy can help you to dig deeper into your lived experiences and find a positive way forward. 

You might be experiencing any of the following:

  • A relationship problem 
  • A change in career 
  • Symptoms of anxiety such as restlessness, agitation and heart palpitations
  • Panic attacks
  • A change at work
  • Your company is forced into unwanted circumstances
  • Court proceedings
  • A serious physical illness
  • Loneliness
  • Sexual dysfunction
  • An addiction
  • A breakdown of trust, such as an affair
  • Stress
  • Burnout
  • Loss of a loved one, or a loved relationship

And there are many more situations that talking therapy can help you with. 

Therapy as a preventative

Therapy isn’t just about treating a problem. It can help prevent problems occurring in the first place. Think about it this way; When you are trying to lose weight, you may choose to go to a gym and work out. But once you’ve lost the weight, you need to keep going to stay in shape. The same can be said about your mental health. Even if you are not currently experiencing any major life changes or depressive symptoms, you could benefit from seeing a therapist. We tend to repeat what we don’t repair – so if there is a pattern in your past that has been left undealt with, it is likely to resurface in the future. 

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

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Feedback from Clients

Feedback from Daniel C., age 30

 

Feeling lost and alone, I decided to give therapy with Mark a try. Living in a foreign country (Denmark) far from home, far from friends and from my wife, I felt that this was not the life I wanted. I was afraid of the future.

The days were hard to pass, going to bed was a relief and waking up a pain to do. To escape reality and soothe myself I got into obsessive compulsive physical behaviours that left little energy and time to do anything else. I masturbated several times a day.

Working or even planning something nice for myself became very hard, and I did not know how to change that.

I saw Mark about 20 times over the course of 6 months.

Communicating with Mark was easy. He is clever, competent, and knew where things were going. I always felt safe with him and could trust him completely. That was fundamental for following the steps he suggested to regain my health and even getting to know myself much better than before.

Based om my experience, I absolutely recommend him to others. Mark is very emphatic. In fact, I did recommend him to a friend of mine who was going through a rough time also.

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

Or contact me here

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Feedback from Clients

Feedback from Alex H., age 38

As a gay man, I have been brought up in a society that tells me directly and indirectly that I am bad, wrong or less worthy because of my sexual orientation. Before starting therapy, I was experiencing an identity crisis. I was feeling disconnected, stuck and anxious about my relationship as well as other aspects of my life and needed to understand why.

Mark is very perceptive and has an acute awareness of what is happening for me at that moment. Both in the room in the present moment and outside of it.

He always offers me (at times brutal) honesty stemming from empathy and understanding. Mark also has a wicked sense of humour. There is a part of myself and my emotions that have been closed off due to my upbringing and other past experiences. Mark has allowed me to re-connect with and explore these emotions and discover the strength that lies within them. I feel very challenged and rewarded at the same time.

Mark offers presence, and from there acknowledges and sees me, along with what I am struggling with. He gives me a broader perspective and can guide me. All of which gives me clarity for a better state of mind. Therapy makes me feel more grounded and connected with myself.

For other people with issues around their sexual orientation, I recommend seeing Mark. Mark is very respectful and open minded. He creates an environment where I feel safe and seen so I can share my deepest thoughts and feelings. Through therapy with Mark, I have leant the importance of acknowledging and accepting my sexuality and how previous experiences have shaped different aspects of my life.

I have had both face-to-face and online sessions with Mark. Online sessions are very similar to a face-to-face session with added convenience and the calm of being in my own space, rather than having to come to Mark’s therapy offices.

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

Or contact me here

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Feedback from Clients

Feedback from Adam and Patricia K, ages 29 and 28

Adam: Mark isn’t the right fit for everyone. I personally definitely recommend him, because he fits our needs as a couple’s therapist very well.

He effortlessly switches between a mix of deep therapy and then offering personalised, light-hearted engagement, which makes the session more comfortable and insightful as a whole.

I really like his style, he is very straight forward, and is also able to adjust his style depending on our needs.

I have never been to couples therapy before, and at first it was a little scary, just because it was something new, but the more sessions we have, the more I learn, and the more I look forward to the next one.

Patricia: I would recommend Mark to you as a couple’s therapist, simply because I am happy and grateful for the sessions my husband and I are having with Mark. I think any couple could potentially benefit from such a process.

My relationship with my husband had been on a downward spiral for a while, and we hit rock bottom before contacting Mark.

We needed help with improving our communication and becoming a good influence on each other’s lives.

Having Mark as our couple’s therapist definitely helped us understand the underlying dynamics in play between us, and Mark has offered us manageable tools in how to tackle our relationship with a fresh perspective.

On a personal note, it is not always easy to be confronted with some hard truths in therapy, but it is also helpful.

I think Mark has a friendly energy with a fierce style. Less distant than other professionals; Mark really engages. He feels like that close friend type who will hear the deeper truths, and then put them directly on the table.

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

Or contact me here

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Feedback from Clients

Feedback from Charlie (she/her), age 42

A friend made referred me to Mark about 2 years ago. I have worked on and off with Mark since. Back then, there were some major life changing events happening, all at the same time, which made it difficult for me to cope with myself. I realized that I needed some professional help.

My therapy with Mark is all about looking at myself through lenses that Mark provides me with. I have looked at my narratives with new perspectives and learned a few new skills to see my life from.

For example, I am seeing how my romantic relationships have more to do with my family background than I realized.

Mark has a good grip of my issues, he is well prepared, and he can be brutally honest sometimes.

Since starting with Mark, the world is never quite the same again in a positive way.

I have referred him to other of my friends and professional network.

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

Or contact me here

Categories
Feedback from Clients

Feedback from Stine & Peter, ages 41 and 43

Our experience with Mark as our couple’s therapist began over 5 years ago. With the choices we had in made life, the pressures of a young family and demanding careers – we had spent too little time investing in making our relationship work.  As we grew individually and things around us changed, we needed help in ensuring that our relationship adapted to all these changes … and ultimately how to rediscover one another.

Mark’s support has been instrumental in guiding us to where our relationship is today.

Mark has been helping us at different points during the course of our relationship when we faced particularly difficult periods. Mark very quickly recognizes fundamental relationship patterns and he has an excellent ability to cut through the armour and the bull shit talking, facilitating what he sees in a direct and honest manner.

His guidance through the process of recognizing when negative patterns showed up is very clear. We appreciate his compassionate directness, emotional intelligence and straight-shooting honesty, all of which have helped us immeasurably.

Regarding recommending Mark, we provide 2 voices….

Stine: I highly recommend Mark as he has been a key element for us to navigate through tough periods, especially in situations when we had grown very far apart in our individual development journey. We had both considered divorce at some point and Mark played a big part in us finding each other again.

Peter:  When you your car needs fixing, you find the best mechanic. When you need an operation, you find the best surgeon. If you need help with your relationship, you make sure to find the best therapist. For our relationship, Mark was that person and I have no hesitation in personally recommending him to you.

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

Or contact me here

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Feedback from Clients

Feedback from Ellen Kallenbach, age 36

I was referred by our second couple’s therapist to Mark as a couples therapist. My husband and I were struggling to communicate for years.  We held regular weekly sessions for about 6 months.

During my time with Mark, I discovered more about myself then with any other therapist. Mark helped me identify issues I was struggling with within values and boundaries in all my relationships. I found Mark’s approach to differ from the other couple’s therapists regarding getting to a more enlightened place far more quickly.

The pace at which he worked was faster than what I was used to, but the results came along with that, and I am grateful.

I highly recommend Mark to all who are dedicated to doing the work.

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

Or contact me here

Categories
Feedback from Clients

Feedback from S.P., age 52

I have sought psychotherapy with Mark on and off for about 9 years.

I initially came to therapy as I had a depression. Whilst in therapy, a family member committed suicide. During these difficult times in my life, I describe Mark as a straightforward and razor-sharp psychotherapist, at the same time deeply compassionate and engaged.

I highly recommend Mark – he applies a wide and rich palette of therapy approaches, ranging from more classic psychotherapy to spiritual and ancestral engagements, from dream analysis to very hands-on and practical advice.

 

Getting the support you need

I offer you acute couples counselling, couples therapy and individual psychotherapy based on your preferences, either online, at your place, or at my clinics in Østerbro or Svendborg.

We can also go for a walk.

My pledge

Whichever help and support you need, my pledge to you is consistent.

Next step

Book a free 15 minute conversation, which is all you need to begin your journey. We will talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and how I can help you get there.

Or contact me here